I believe what is happening is that you are putting together a standard pipe thread onto an NPT. They are slightly different threads, thus they don't mesh together perfectly. How deep are you getting it? I have heard folks who have had no problem doing this, and I've seen others that have. I'd water test it, or get a valve that matches the threading. As for putting the hose on - I did the same thing you are doing - putting the 1" over the standard thread, not the barbs. Many of the fittings don't come in barbs. I've had no leaking at all doing this. I'm sure it isn't the best practice, but I've done this on at least a dozen different attachments and it has worked just fine.
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