Happy or Kick Butt??

I have a conundrum. My son took our 2004 boat out yesterday and finally landed his first backroll. Pretty exciting stuff for him - his first invert. But, he was picking someone up at a dock and managed to not see a screw sticking out which scraped a two-inch long, 1/8th of an inch deep gash in the gell coat just above the rubrail. Estimates are $300-400 to fix it. So, while I am happy for his backroll success, I want to kick his butt for being careless and damaging the boat. I can't decide which emotion (happy or kick butt) is going to win overall. If it was your boat and your son, what would be more important to you???

What do you love more?? Your son or your boat?? you can fix your boat and it's just a scratch, but fixing your son's feelings after laying into him about an accident is alot harder.

Let it ride, maybe make him pay for half the damage or simply talk to him about these issues and being careful. Sounds like he was not being all that careless, just a victim of a stupid loose screw on a dock. I don't know how bad he feels about it, he may be bummed anyway. Maybe he did not see the screw and was simply paying attention to docking and safety??

Don't let a scratch in the boat ruin boating and your son becoming a great wakeboarder. That's what the boat is for anyway. *&IT happens.

(Message edited by Flux on August 09, 2006)

i'm sure your son wouldn't hit a screw on purpose. accidents happen.

happy. there will be more boats and more scratches. sounds like he doesn't take it out all that much by himself. i would do something to make him more responsible. tell him he can use the resale from that one for down pmt on the next, or something like that. if is his baby too, he'll help take care of it a lot more.

I don't see the conundrum. Being happy that your son landed a backroll doesn't seem to have much to do with being upset that he hit an exposed screw. Just be clear to your son that one has nothing to do with the other and dole out whatever punishment you deem appropriate.

I always give my children the opportunity to fix something themselves. I usually even offer to help with the repair. This would be a good chance for both of you to learn a bit about fiberglass repair. And the painstaking work will certainly remind your kid to be more careful next time out.

kick his ass. just because he lands an invert doesn't give him carte blanche to act like a pro who gets a new boat every year.

Make you feel better? Probably not... let it slide.

Yeah let it ride.....don't kill his stoke for him having an accident.

No matter what, the stoke for the new trick has to be there.

As far as the scratch goes, I think your reaction depends on your kid. Is he normally a responsible kid that simply made a rare mistake or do these "accidents" seem to happen to him quite frequently.

If this is a rarity for him, I think you should just be proud that you've got a responsible boy and let it slide (but be sure he knows how much it cost you to fix it).

If he's generally a pretty careless person, then I'd make him pay for it or consider not letting him use the boat for a while. He needs to learn to be responsible for things even if they aren't his.

My kids are going through a bit of a "head in the clouds" phase right now where they don't think beyond the next fun thing they're going to do. After leaving their flip flops out in the backyard to get chewed up by the dog for the 10th time, I started making them pay for the new flip flops. They don't have much money, so it definitely makes them a little more responsible and the flip flop chewings have decreased dramatically!

Why would you kick his ass? Sh*t happens.

Teach him how to fix it and move on...

I would use the same technique. Tell my dad I landed a new trick after i scratch the boat. It would get me off easier. lol JK

WakeShoe,
Just remember we all make mistakes no matter what our age, its only a boat, just like Flux stated. Just be cool with him about it and use this as a learning tool so he knows what to watch for next time. If he can help pay for the damages that will help him be even more aware of these things next time. Just my .02, thats how I handle these things with my son. If he does it again though, then its time to start the beatings, lol.

No reason to get upset over something small. No one was injured, just a little damage. Have him help fix it, or help pay for it. Make sure he knows things like this happen and to work hard to not do them again. Is getting upset going to solve the problem. If these "accidents" happen frequently, you should question your judgement for letting him be responsible for something of such large costs.

It's a boat, for Pete's sake. As a father I know that sometimes reactions happen before thought, just like picking someone up at the doc and not seeing the screw. A couple hundered dollars of boat and tow vehicle washing and waxings should more than make up for it....

Its only money...its not like its an arm or leg...right?

i know i have messed up my own stuff and wanted to kick my own ass. but boats get messed up no matter how well you try and preserve them. if it was intentional -YES BEAT HIM!! if it was an accident then what can you do. get it fixed and wait for the next thing, torn vinyl or mildew , whatever

punch him in the face then hug him.

That's the way my dad rolled - and I'm not •••••• up....

i went into boating knowing that stuff was going to get messed up on my boat. I can't necasarilly relate when it comes to my son, as he's only 1 year old, but the bottom line is...life's too short. Congratulate him for his new trick, tell him that you're a little disappointed that he damaged the boat, but you have faith that he was doing all he could to take care of it. Hopefully that was the case...

oh, and Clayton, you are f'd up, you just don't know it.

Kidding of course....

I think its a pretty cheap leason learned. He prob. feels worse about it than you do. Make him pay half and then give him a big hug.

SHOW him what to WATCH for so next time he will be heads up when approaching a pier...

Like others have said, he knows he made a mistake and feels bad about it...

Now go and congratulate him on his backroll

Done and thanks. I am pretty proud of his backroll success.

Seems to me that the person who owns the dock is at fault. There is a lot going on when docking a boat and not everyone can see every little thing all the time. If it is your dock and you knew about it then your son should kick your butt. If you guys have a standing rule to put out the bumpers then you may have issue, but, at the same time just pulling up real quick and not putting out bumpers is not a major sin. I did it all the time. I do have to repeat. Screws sticking out of the dock is not the first thing that comes to my mind when dealing with the boat especially when I was a new driver. If it is a public dock that people have to pay to launch, then it sure as heck better be in good repair.

$300-$400 to fix? Have Dave send you some wakeworld stickers, pimp wake world with a son that is starting to stick some tricks, and cover up that scratch. Win win situation. You can delay the cost of the repair and have your ride pimped.

(Message edited by deltahoosier on August 10, 2006)