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Old    Dennie (wakeboardgeezer)      Join Date: May 2009       05-21-2012, 10:52 AM Reply   
Aint gonna be many DAWGS if this crap keeps up! (Hes back)

MY LAST TRIP TO HOMOCO!!!

Yesterday, I was at my local HOMOCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, KRANKY, the Wonder Dog, and was in the check-out line when a LIBERAL behind me asked if I had a dog. What did HE think, I had an elephant?

So, since I'm retired and cant WAKEBOARD during the winter I have little to do, on impulse I told the SOCIALIST that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my ORIFICES and IVs in both arms.

I told the DEMOCRAT that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story as they were also LIBERALS,.. after all this is a HOMOCO store.)

Horrified, they asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told the OVER SPENDER no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's hind end and a car hit me.

I thought the COMMUNIST behind the SECULAR HUMANIST was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

HOMOCO won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask CONSERVATIVES, unlike LIBERALS they have all the time in the world to think of LOGICAL things to say!

For my friend Sam and estranged buddy Jeremy (grin)
Old    John Anderson (fly135)      Join Date: Jun 2004       05-21-2012, 3:24 PM Reply   
Just goes to show what happens when a liberal tries to make small talk with a fruitcake.
Old    Big D (bigdtx)      Join Date: Feb 2005       05-22-2012, 6:21 AM Reply   
That one wasn't funny when it showed up in my inbox in 1998.
Old    Jeremy (wake77)      Join Date: Jan 2009       05-23-2012, 1:57 PM Reply   
You have inspired me Geez. I will cast my vote for the true conservative in November. The gun-toting, gay-hating, anti-baby killing, anti-government healthcare (well, after he decided to run for president anyways), die-hard christian (okay scratch that one); Mitt Romney. I have a stiffy right now just thinking about it.
Old    John Anderson (fly135)      Join Date: Jun 2004       05-23-2012, 2:39 PM Reply   
Mittens for President!

This message brought to you by Christians for Cult Religions
Old    Paul (psudy)      Join Date: Dec 2003       05-24-2012, 9:36 AM Reply   
As a republican I am absolutely embarrassed by the OP.
Old    Shawndoggy (shawndoggy)      Join Date: Nov 2009       05-24-2012, 10:57 AM Reply   
Can someone explain this to me? I can't even understand it.
Old    John Anderson (fly135)      Join Date: Jun 2004       05-24-2012, 11:43 AM Reply   
Quote:
Originally Posted by shawndoggy View Post
Can someone explain this to me? I can't even understand it.
Maybe we can DaMoose in here to interpret.
Old    Joe (ilikebeaverandboats)      Join Date: Jul 2007       05-24-2012, 11:52 AM Reply   
Quote:
Originally Posted by fly135 View Post
Maybe we can DaMoose in here to interpret.
Hhahahahahahaha
Old    Jeremy (wake77)      Join Date: Jan 2009       05-24-2012, 7:02 PM Reply   
"Maybe we can DaMoose in here to interpret."

Even DaMoose can't understand DaGeez.
Old    Akadirtbikingdad (wakeboardingdad)      Join Date: Aug 2008       05-26-2012, 7:29 AM Reply   
I'm gonna try the diet. Those morsels of dogfood have got to fare better in my pockets than the tots!
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