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supradoug 09-09-2013 8:29 PM

Geese Problem
my neighbors at the lake feed the damn geese daily....they have started crapping all over my dock and several of the neighbors docks...is there any type of spray i could treat the deck with? I hung a couple owls up but somebody wanted them more than me.......I have asked that he not feed them but this made matters worse....short of somebody getting an ass whopping, do you have any ideas.

Jmorlan 09-09-2013 8:48 PM

A couple bricks of cheap .22 rounds should do the trick.

ttrigo 09-09-2013 8:59 PM

goose crap is nasty too! if there are no rules within an association or anything, you might be screwed. just try and discuss this with the neighbor again, and show him what a mess they make. if that doesnt do it, just make sure you are outside with an airhorn when the geese are there. if possible anyways. constant noise will end up keeping them away, regardless of food.

flatbroke 09-10-2013 1:50 AM

I'd get a motion operated impact sprinkler. My father made one to keep deer off the lawn. It works great. Just have a switch to turn it off when you need. Aim it low and have lots of water pressure.

brett33 09-10-2013 6:16 AM

Try the "Goosinator"

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/junuoSsHqks" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

It only retails for $3,495.. haha

jaegermaster 09-10-2013 6:46 AM

Sweep up the Goose poop and deposit it on his dock?

plhorn 09-10-2013 8:25 AM

Goose is delicious. Buy less beef and eat more geese. problem solved.

psudy 09-10-2013 9:21 AM

Walmart sells a pellet gun that shoots at 1200 fps. Its quiet, and cheap. Or you could get a dog.

fly135 09-10-2013 9:28 AM

Bottle Rockets

phathom 09-10-2013 9:33 AM

*Begin Disclaimer*
I am in no way implying, suggesting, or otherwise encouraging any of the below. This is for educational purposes. Anything resulting from actions taken after reading are the responsibilities of the user. In no way is the author of this post liable for any consequences one may face as a result of reading this post.
*End Disclaimer*

I have seen people who have troubles with bigger birds like that, seagulls, ducks, geese, etc. Take some alka-selzter and feed it to them. When a bird eats this, because they have no mechanism to burp, fart, etc. The gasses from the alka-selzter that mix with the moisture in their stomach causes their small stomachs to rapidly expand far beyond it's natural capacity. This in simple terms makes their stomach explode and kills them.
Some say it is a cruel way to get rid of them, but then again isn't slipping on goose poop while carrying your board, hurting yourself, breaking your board, scratching your boat and ripping your upholstery with broken board fragments cruel too?

Also Pop Rocks thrown in the mix couldn't hurt...

hco 09-10-2013 1:38 PM

22 or pellet gun. You can make a home made silencer easy enough for the 22 if you want, in the early morning shoot a few and the neighbor will never know.

09-10-2013 1:45 PM

Might be worth a try to spray this on your dock:


phathom 09-10-2013 1:56 PM

Ok, even though this whole post is mainly about (illegally) killing these geese. The Homemade .22 silencer is BATFE illegal, like federal, not just whatever else. Not a good one to break in the event you do get caught. The other ones, if caught, might end up with fines or a short stint, the silencer without tax stamp = lots of $ and lots of time talking to Bubba.
Key thing don't get caught!
A good way to do this, and even misdirect the blame if it does come up. Find out what EXACTLY your neighbor has been feeding them. Brand and type of bread, crackers, etc.
Go out and buy the exact same thing, with cash, at a small mini mart with no cameras, make sure you weren't followed. At a different location, possibly in disguise, also with cash, buy some rat poison.
Basically feed them covertly or even find a way to switch their feed with the poisoned feed (pay attention to amount left in the original feed so the neighbor doesn't get suspicious about his magically refilled goose feed).
That way either you poison them and whoever finds out thinks it was your neighbor. Even better because he was feeding them and the poisoned ones are found out to be under your neighbors control and they can't link it to you, then your neighbor gets busted for being a dbag and feeding the birds, calling them there.
The multiple locations for supplies, disguises, cash, etc. were all so it can't be tracked to you and your neighbor takes the fall for poisoning the ducks. It helps if you tell him (with witnesses) that he shouldn't feed them, because human germs and food can make them sick. Make it really sound like you are concerned about the well being of the geese as the reason you don't want him to feed them, nothing about your dock/boat. That way when it gets found out that he ignored that and was poisoning them, it will make you look like the good concerned neighbor and him like the evil goose murdering neighbor (which you really are, kinda).
Also delete this thread so if the cops investigate what the guy was doing with google searches of, "Geese Problem"s or "How to get rid of geese" they don't stumble upon this and find out it was really you.

Once again:
*Begin Disclaimer*
I am in no way implying, suggesting, or otherwise encouraging any of the above. This is for educational purposes. Anything resulting from actions taken after reading are the responsibilities of the user. In no way is the author of this post liable for any consequences one may face as a result of reading this post.
*End Disclaimer*

Jmorlan 09-10-2013 2:07 PM

And now you are stuck with aiding in their demise ^^ LOL

phathom 09-10-2013 2:09 PM

Nope. Read the disclaimer :D

09-10-2013 2:32 PM


diamonddad 09-10-2013 2:32 PM

A motion activated sprinkler is an easy option.


bcrider 09-10-2013 2:59 PM

Kill as many as you can!! They are our national bird and the damn things are sky rats. We need to cull a huge amount of them up here but all the bleeding hearts won't let it happen.

09-10-2013 3:21 PM

Bring in Maverick! He killed Goose right???

Jmorlan 09-10-2013 3:48 PM

May I suggest a lawn chair, a case of Busch light, and an Elmer Fudd double barrel shotgun across your lap? Positioned before the neighborly feeding time.

The crazy redneck approach seems to be quite sufficient around these parts.

diamonddad 09-10-2013 6:46 PM

Here's one that requires no power and no hose.


rdlangston13 09-10-2013 10:18 PM

Paint ball gun, quiet, non lethal, and will keep them away

Sent from my iPhone

Jmaxymek 09-10-2013 11:21 PM


Originally Posted by bigdtx (Post 1844113)
Bring in Maverick! He killed Goose right???

This. Is. Awesome.

+1 for the motion sensing sprinkler, we have one on our dock to deter geese from climbing up and also to keep them off our beach. Sometimes I get hit with it when I forget to shut it off, but I'm going in the lake anyway, so it's a small price to pay. On the more lethal end of things, we have a 1200fps pellet gun we sometimes break out. It does the job pretty well but we keep it to a minimum because explaining why the geese are dying to the young kids is a daunting task. Dogs also help, but bottomline, the sprinkler is probably the most effective.

psudy 09-11-2013 8:51 AM

If you are not in city limits, go buy a damn hunting license and have fun!!!

behindtheboat 09-11-2013 11:39 AM

Unfortunate as it seems the neighbor is more of a problem than the geese. I can understand your frustration, I got in some yelling matches with patrons of the marina I kept my boat at who would feed the ducks, which loved my platform being so close to the water. I just find the poisoning options as a lazy man's way out, where the geese have been lead into and tricked to their death. They're a problem, I understand, but so is society when we look for the easiest, most convenient way to KILL any other living creature is poisoning their food or making them internally explode. Reminds me of how hunters poison raccoons, because they eat the feed that the hunters leave out for deer, so they can conveniently hunt the deer. The real issue is with the neighbor, and anyone who thinks feeding the birds is a good thing at all.

phathom 09-11-2013 11:52 AM

You know what, A-Dub is right. Don't be lazy about it. Take to it like a real man, or hell a toddler and just start choking the damn geese to death with your bare hands!

psudy 09-11-2013 1:15 PM

yeah. Its not the goose who is at fault. Kill the damn neighbor!

grant_west 09-11-2013 3:52 PM

Do some research you'll find information where an abundance of goose poop Has deemed some waterways Unhealthy to swim in Let your neighbors know that by feeding the geese they are lowering the quality of the water in which you recreate. I'm sure if your neighbors knew that by feeding the geese there in sense Polluting the lake they would be more Agreeable to stop doing it

deuce 09-12-2013 9:43 AM


Originally Posted by bigdtx (Post 1844113)
Bring in Maverick! He killed Goose right???

Awesome! Best post on WW in a LONG TIME.

All the talk of killing these geese doesn't make much sense, then instead of a bunch of poop, he has to clean up a bunch of dead animals....FUN!

brettw 09-12-2013 10:54 AM

Learn how to fly r/c helicopters and have fun chasing the things away.

monkey_butt 09-12-2013 4:26 PM

A little fence/band along shore/property line - maybe 8 inches high will do the trick as long as the cant fly directly into your yard ... This what everybody is doing at our lake and they don't get on shore where these little 'fences' are ... Simple, fast and cheap

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